Nigerian Abroad Marriages II: The Quest For Female Nurses

Nigerian Abroad Marriages II: The Quest For Female Nurses

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By Joy Chinecherem

Di obodo oyibo is an average Nigerian girl’s dream, but as the popular slang goes “Are you your spec’s spec?” Turns out our Nigerian men abroad have their specifics narrowed down. It’s not unusual to see a Nigerian man based abroad when listing attributes of a potential wife include ‘must be a nurse’ or someone in the medical field. Several times many of us have seen this come into play on social media matchmaking platforms. Brothers/friends abroad who might have enlisted our help at one point add this as a very necessary criterion. 

When their spec is not met, they marry the young girls willing to go through nursing school either here in Nigeria or abroad.

Based on data from the Migration Policy Institute as of 2015, Nigeria was the third source country for foreign-born registered nurses in the US. 

You would be wondering the reason for this mad quest for health workers especially nurses by our brothers abroad, is there a special beauty about them? Or are they the best wives? This and the aftermath of this business investment marriage is our focus.   

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Nigerian-Abroad Marriages I: The Perks Of Marrying An Obodo Oyibo Husband

Why Nurses?

The health sector in the US is very lucrative, ezigbo ego mbute like some would say. 

In the United States, the average annual salary for a Registered Nurse is currently $73,550 which breaks down as an average of $35.36 per hour, $1,414 per week, and a monthly salary of $6,129.

In Canada, nurses make an average of $78,546 per year or $40.28 per hour. Entry-level positions start at around $41,396 per year and students make anywhere from $20-30 per hour. While most experienced workers make up to about $95,704 per year, the most qualified and experienced nurses in Canada can make $100,000 or more annually. An average health worker in the US is paid $49,000. Now, do the math, and you have a living goldmine.  

What is more attractive than money, these nurses become the most sought after commodity next to diamond. This leads to situations of Nigerian men targeting Nigerian ladies that are in nursing schools, pharmacy schools, and medical schools. They care less about whether there is love or not between them. 

These men who live in America look forward to marrying a nurse who they can turn into a money-spinning machine. You see a truck pusher in America; he is looking for a nurse to marry. The ones who are already married here, the moment they come to America, the wife must change her profession immediately to become a nurse in the next three or four years. These women are considered money machines rather than humans.

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According to the National Association of Nigerian Nurses in North America  (NANNNA) study, it revealed that some Nigerian-American men often return to Nigeria to marry nurses or women they later convince to adopt the profession as a passport to a better life.

These men believe they have suffered enough, and therefore see their investment wives as a retirement plan and expect their return on investment, for a marriage that is based on this framework, does it always work? Even an oil well dries up at some point. The aftermath of these marriages are most times not rosy and has gory endings.

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Aftermath of Abroad nursing marriage

Today marriages we can say have gone beyond looking for love but looking for comfort, what both parties stand to gain financially while some are based on the sole purpose of children and other logical reasons. 

In other words, people marry for different reasons which work sometimes but a relationship that is built on the exploitation of another thrives no more than a plant sowed amongst rocks.

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After the mad rush for ladies in the medical field, one would think they will be cherished like when you finally get the object of your quest, you painstakingly take care of it. It’s quite the contrary on the side of these ladies, some of these Nigerian men treat their wives that they ‘imported’ from Nigeria like their slaves or their personal business empires. Some, after helping their new spouses through Nursing Schools, they now see them as their meal tickets. But meal tickets are cherished and guarded jealously, yeah?          

According to stories, paydays have some of these men standing at the door waiting for their investment wives, hands outstretched for their paycheque. Mind you, some of these men quit their jobs and then, totally relying on their wives to bring in the money. Some take it a step further, globe-trotting and gallivanting all over the place while their investment is somewhere working round shift.

According to Ogiehor-Enoma, a nurse and executive director of the National Association of Nigerian Nurses in North America (NANNNA)

“After bringing their female partners to the US and or funding their nursing education, some of the men feel entitled to their partners’ salaries and insist on controlling their income. Once the women start to work, the men expect a return on their investment, but in the US they often find it harder than anticipated to control their partners”.

“Decisions about how money is spent are a source of conflict. The women were blamed for rebelling against this expectation and sometimes flaunting their superior contribution to their peril.”

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The US being a country that has a woman-friendly legal system affords these nurses the backings to act in what way that pleases them which can be positive or negative. Hence, some of the husbands start to feel intimidated and inferior which oftentimes drove them to the edge. 

 “I have killed the woman that messed my life up … a woman that destroyed me.”

This was a call placed to 911 on July 24, 2008, by a Nigerian man in Hennepin County, Minnesota after he shot his wife, Antonia Iheme, dead. Antonia was a nurse in the US. Antonia’s death is one amongst many murders of female nurses perpetrated by their husbands out of anger and frustration. In another incident, a husband bludgeoned his wife to death with a sledgehammer in the presence of their daughter. 

Several cases abound of how these our abroad goldmine marriages turned out, but then in the midst of all, there are many which thrived and are still thriving well. Tales of abroad marriages abound and are diversified, follow us as we talk about Foreigners in Nigeria marrying Nigerian women. 

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